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| Causes of Nushooz That Can
Be Traced Back to the Husband Marital Discord [al-Nushooz], Its Definition, Cases, Causes, Means of Protection From It, and Its Remedy From the Quran and Sunnah Dr. Saalih ibn Ghaanim al-Sadlaan Translated by Jamaal al-Din M. Zarabozo, © S. Al-Sadlaan and J. Zarabozo The husband himself may be the cause of the
woman’s disobedience and rebelliousness. For example, he may be very
stingy and miserly. He may also be very emotional and excitable. He may
also be someone who is very harsh, tough and despotic. He may be one who
forces his will and decisions upon his wife in every matter without
consulting with her, not taking into consideration her feelings, nor
exchanging views on the matter and not being pleasant with his wife. He
might consider his wife like some kind of chattel [instead of another
human] and therefore deals with her with coldness and coarseness without
any compassion or gentleness. The cause for that may also be in his evil
friends who sow discontent and evil between a man and his wife by leading
him and pushing him to disliking and hating his wife and wishing to be
free from her. "[In fact,] (his extreme good nature
beyond normal limits) may also lead to his wife to change her disposition
and make her try to override him and then disobey his commands and elevate
herself above him." [Majallah al-Jundi al-Muslim, p. 29, fn.1.] "He may cause his wife different forms
of harm, such as cursing her or her family, reviling her, verbally abusing
her for the tiniest of reasons. He may insult her because of her family,
if it is less prestigious or honorable than his. Or [another act of
nushooz on his part is that] he may try to bring harm to her by divorcing
her and then, before the waiting period is finished, bring her back as his
wife and then divorce her again. All this is done without the intention of
returning to a real married life but simply to harm her and transgress her
rights. Or he may avoid having sexual intercourse with her for no reason
or legal sanction. This may lead the woman to lose her chastity and doing
something forbidden." [Al-Bahuti al-Hanbali, Kishaaf al-Qinaa’ an
Matn al-Iqnaa’, vol. 5, pp. 184, 290, 213; Ibn Abideen, Radd al-Mukhtar
ala al-Darr al-Mukhtar wa Hashiyah, vol. 3, p. 190; Tafseer al-Manaar,
vol. 5, p. 76.] Shaikh al-Islam ibn Taimiya stated,
"The harm that comes about to the woman by the man avoiding sexual
intercourse with her is such that the marriage may be dissolved under
every circumstance, regardless if it was intentional from the husband or
unintentional, or if he had the ability to perform sexual intercourse or
not." [Ibn Taimiyah, al-Fatawa al-Kubra, vol. 4, p. 562; Ibn Taimiyah,
Majmuah al-Fatawa, vol. 32, p. 40.] Nushooz on the part of the husband includes when he orders her to do something forbidden or illegal, such as
going out in public displaying her beauty or uncovering parts of her that
must be covered, to go among men she is not related to, to drink alcohol
or take drugs, go to clubs and salons wherein bad things are taking place. Also from nushooz on the part of the
husband is his not fulfilling his marital obligations. For example, he
makes life difficult for her with respect to her food, drink, clothing and
so forth. [Translator’s footnote: This is one of the biggest marital
problems that one can see occurring in the West. Many times, the husbands
simply do not support their wives and families. Although they have the
physical and other means to work and support their families, they would
resort to putting themselves and their families on the welfare system.
Often times, the husbands will give the flimsiest excuses for not
accepting work and therefore put families in such situations. Many times,
the husband would rather force his wife to go out and work – which, in
the West, almost always involves putting the Muslim woman into situations
that she should not be put into – rather than he accept a job that he is
not completely pleased with. Hence, their families do not achieve the
economic well-being that they deserve and, often, the wife loses respect
for the husband as he is not performing one of his most important
obligations of married life: providing maintenance for his wife and
family. Sooner or later this often leads to many other problems within the
marriage, although the root of those problems is the husband’s
unwillingness to work and sustain the family.] Or he makes her live in a
residence that is not something suitable for her. In addition, included among the acts of
nushooz is his unfair distribution of his time or where he stays [when he
is married to more than one wife] without legal justification. Or, he may
not fulfill the needs of his wife and children such that their well-being
is not met. Or, he does things that hurt and dishonor his wife and show
lack of respect for her, such as backbiting, slandering her or joking
about her. Or, he may be desirous of her wealth and forces her to spend it
on his behalf. The following are also acts that constitute
nushooz on the part of the husband: having anal intercourse with her,
which is forbidden and is never permissible, his travelling for fun,
amusement and entertainment without taking her permission as he is thereby
wasting ample wealth for a useless purpose, while that wealth is meant to
sustain the rights of his household. If the man apostates from Islam – and
refuge is sought in Allah – that is considered nushooz and the marriage
contract is dissolved unless he returns to Islam. [See al-Khalafaat al-Zaujiyah,
p. 39.] There are many other causes or acts of nushooz that we have not mentioned here in order not to overly lengthen the discussion. |