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| Good Manners At Home
Spreading kindness in the home 'Aa'ishah (RA) said: "The Messenger of
Allah (SAW) said: According to another report: In other words, they start to be kind to
one another. This is one of the means of attaining happiness in the home,
for kindness is very beneficial between the spouses, and with the
children, and brings results that cannot be achieved through harshness, as
the Prophet (SAW) said: Helping one's wife with the housework Many men think that housework is beneath
them, and some of them think that it will undermine their status and
position if they help their wives with this work. The Messenger of Allah (SAW), however, used
to "sew his own clothes, mend his own shoes and do whatever other
work men do in their homes." (Reported by Imaam Ahmad in al-Musnad,
6/121; Saheeh al-Jaami', 4927). This was said by his wife 'Aa'ishah (RA),
when she was asked about what the Messenger of Allah (SAW) used to do in
his house; her response described what she herself had seen. According to
another report, she said: She (RA) was also asked about what the
Messenger of Allah (SAW) used to do in his house, and she said, If we were to do likewise nowadays, we
would achieve three things: * We would be following the example of the
Prophet (SAW). Some men demand food instantly from their
wives, when the pot is on the stove and the baby is screaming to be fed;
they do not pick up the child or wait a little while for the food. Let
these Hadith be a reminder and a lesson. Being affectionate towards and joking with
the members of the family "Why did you not marry a virgin, so
you could play with her and she could play with you, and you could make
her laugh and she could make you laugh?" (The hadeeth is reported in
a number of places in the Saheehayn, such as al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 9/121) The Prophet (SAW) also said: The Prophet (SAW) used to treat his wife 'Aa'ishah
(RA) affectionately when doing ghusl with her, as she (RA) said: The ways in which the Prophet (SAW) showed
affection towards young children are too famous to need mentioning. He
often used to show his affection towards Hasan and Husayn, as mentioned
above. This is probably one of the reason why the children used to rejoice
when he came back from travelling; they would rush to welcome him, as
reported in the saheeh hadith: "Whenever the Prophet (SAW) came back
from a journey, we would be taken out to meet him. One day we met him,
Hasan, Husayn and I. He carried one of us in front of him, and another on
his back, until we entered Madeenah." (Saheeh Muslim, 4/1885-2772;
see the commentary in Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi, 8/56). Compare this with the situation in some
miserable homes where there are no truthful jokes [i.e., jokes that do not
involve lying], no affection and no mercy. Whoever thinks that kissing his
children goes against the dignity of fatherhood should read the following
hadeeth: from Abu Hurayrah (RA) who said:
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