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Effects of Witnessing Domestic Violence on Children

 


All children are affected by abuse and violence. 
The signs may be different because of how kids decode and interpret the experience, have learned to cope and survive in stress and the support system available to them.

Emotional Effects:

  • guilt - feel responsible for violence

  • shame - "it doesn't happen anywhere else"

  • fear - of expressing feelings (anger), of divorce or separation, of the unknown, of injury, of a hostile world

  • confusion - conflicted loyalties (love/hate)

  • anger - about violence, abuse, chaos

  • depression -  a sense of helplessness and powerlessness to change things 

  • grief - of losses

  • burdened - inappropriate roles as caretaker, parent, etc.



Behavioral Effects:

  • act out vs. withdraw

  • overachiever vs. underachiever

  • school refusal

  • care-taking - filling adult roles

  • aggressive bullying or passive doormats

  • rigid defenses - aloof, sarcastic, rigid, blaming, defensive

  • seeking attention in behaviors

  • bed-wetting

  • nightmares

  • excessive shyness



Physical Effects:

  • somatic complaints (headaches, stomach aches, asthma, etc.)

  • nervous, anxious - short attention span

  • tired, lethargic - (seems like lazy )

  • sickly... colds, flu, etc.

  • neglect personal hygiene

  • regression in developmental tasks (regressive behaviors)

  • no reaction to physical pain



Social Effects:

  • isolated - no friends or distant in relationships

  • avoids bringing friends home

  • relationships with friends may start intensely, ending abruptly

  • difficulty trusting others

  • poor conflict resolution skills

  • excessively socially involved (overcompensates by staying away from home)

  • avoids spending time with family


Cognitive Effects:

  • feels responsible for violence or abuse

  • blames others for their behavior (to not act responsibly

  • feels that it s okay to hit or verbally abuse others you care about to get what you want; express anger; feel powerful

  • low self-concept (cannot succeed in changing violence/abuse)

  • don't ask for what they need

  • don't trust (the promises to change)

  • identify roles as... being a boy means... being a girl means... being a man/woman/parent means... uses abuser and/or victim as examples

Up ] [ effects of domestic violence ] teaching caringness ]